Weddings are wonderful.
Except when you marry the wrong person. But in any case, weddings are intricate ceremonies that require a lot of planning, preparation, and flawless execution. Weddings need so many little elements to make the event magical. From decorations to flowers, to outfits, and even to the invitation, every piece adds to the magic of the night. Should anything go missing or be done poorly, it ruins the overall experience.
So even in the world of Magic, weddings must be prepared well and here’s a deck (check) list of things you need to make your night magical!
Groom: Edgar Markov
Every groom should dress his best and nothing is better than a red suit with one large effin’ brooch and massive collars to complete the look. Weddings are tiring as fudge, so the groom should be afforded a suite to sneak some naps in. While the groom sleeps, you should start wrangling the entourage so that by the time he wakes up, you’ve already had the ring bearer, flower girl, and coin bearer all ready to attack as 2/2 life-linking vampires!
Bride: Liliana of the Veil
Many people say that the wedding day is the bride’s day. I agree, as a married man myself. She has to come out behind the church’s door looking like a million dollars! Liliana shows how it’s done with the chain veil at the ready, well-decorated purple gown, and swirling necromantic magic swirling around her fingers.
Same-Day Support Staff!
Before the bride shows up in the aisle, you better get your curtains closed to accentuate the reveal! When when the bride appears, turn those curtains into snoopy photographers taking endless pictures. Wedding organizers are a must these days so bring those Phyrexian Missionaries in to make sure the aisle is smooth, and if any of the entourage trips (or dies), they’re ready to bring them up!
Best Man: Tenacious Underdog
The best kind of best man is one that never drops no matter how much he drinks. Tenacious Underdog makes for a good best man, and you can rely on him to keep passing the drinks to your family and friends all night long!
Maid of Honor: Liesa, Forgotten Archangel
The maid of honor is equally important, if not even more important. She keeps the bride from going crazy and offers the support the bride needs to carry on throughout the day. Liesa is one hard-working maid of honor because she’ll make sure your guests keep coming back, and any party crasher is sent home never to return.
Event Host: Sorin
The host should be captivating, and dashing, and can capture the audience’s energy and rouse the party all night long. Who best can do this work more than a flawless and handsome vampire with thousands of years of experience under his belt.
While the party continues into the night, the newlyweds will have their first dance, and then the money dance which is a Filipino cultural tradition where guests can extend their support to the newlyweds by sending them some cash to help them start a new life together.
Better bust your bank account and transfer some funds electronically to the newlywed’s account via QR Code before the dance ends. After which, your generosity should invoke some despair as you see your own savings account dwindle because you could have bought more booster packs with the money you just sent.
But enough of the comedy so here’s the decklist. Today’s deck features a BW midrange/controlling shell that is fun to play, has a lot of staying power, and the value engine keeps on giving as the game progresses.
The gameplan is to dish out some early threats to draw out your opponent’s early removal and hopefully trade positively. Throw in your Wedding Announcement to clutter the board while you tick up Liliana and Sorin to harass your opponent’s resources. Cut Down and Soul Transfer can take down mid-to-large size threats and Invoke Despair should refill your hand quite nicely.
In the sideboard, more targeted removal and a graveyard hate package to keep the value train on your side of the fence. Duress for the control match-up and Knockbow Blow for those low-to-the-ground aggro decks that want to crash your wedding!
Hope you enjoyed the cinematic decklist, but do not underestimate the power of the deck either!
Till then, keep shuffling!